The scale has gone up a bit in the last couple weeks, as I have found that I can eat again. Well, I could up until yesterday. The scale read 177 lbs this a.m. but that is sure to change now that I'm back on a liquid diet.
I had my braces put on yesterday. Ow. It hurts. Bad. It's good in a way b/c I can totally see me losing these last 40ish lbs now! LOL
Alot has changed in these last months. A lot inside of me. The way I feel and see things. The way I see myself. It's not all good either. I have realized that I have a distorted body image and though I've lost 100 lbs. I feel as big as ever. I can't explain it. I have everyone telling me how good I look but honestly I don't see it. I "know" I'm smaller, but when I look in the mirror I still see fat. I still see imperfection.
I am constantly reminded of a pic I saw on Beth's "post secret" weight loss blog. There was a post card with a pic of a perfect, tight belly and the words, "I thought I'd look like this.." then a pic of a flabby, saggy, deflated belly and the words, "but I look like this." It's so true. Good grief, how true it is. And it sucks. And it messes with my head.
I know I could always have PS, but I'm tired of pain. As I sit here now, unable to chew or talk right, I just can't imagine going through any more pain. In the last year, I've had a baby, had GBS and now have had all this work done on my teeth. I just can't take any more pain.
So that leaves me in the position of having to accept me... the way I am. I have NEVER 100% done that. Has anyone? Is it possible?
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Quick Stats
- Start Weight: 277 lbs.
- Lowest Weight Post Op:132 lbs.
- Today's Weight: 150 lbs.
- Goal Weight: 140-145 lbs.
Sassy Ring
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ambie7944@yahoo.com
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What Am I Eating Today?
About Me
- Amber
- New Haven, Ohio, United States
- I am a 31 yr old mom of 3...full time student and part time working mom! I am on the journey of a lifetime as I lose 140+ lbs. after having gastric bypass surgery on 04/16/07!
- 3 YEARS POST OP: total loss - lbs. (weight: lbs.)
- Month 35: -6 lbs. (154 lbs.)
- Month 33: +12 (160 lbs.)
- Month 28: -/+ 0 (148 lbs.)
- Month 27: -/+ 0 (148 lbs.)
- Month 26: +1 lb. (148 lbs.)
- Month 25: +3 lbs. (147 lbs.)
- 2 YEARS POST OP: total loss -133 lbs. (weight: 144 lbs.)
- Month 23: -/+ 0 lbs. (145 lbs.)
- Month 22: +2 lbs. (145 lbs.)
- Month 21: -4 lbs. (143 lbs.)
- Month 20: -/+ 0 lbs. (147 lbs.)
- Month 19: +5 lbs. (147 lbs.)
- Month 18: +4 lbs. (142 lbs.)
- Month 17: +6 lbs. (138 lbs.)
- Month 16: -12 lbs. for the month (132 lbs.)
- Month 15: +6 for the month (144 lbs.)
- Month 14: -9 lbs. for the month (138 lbs)
- Week 61: 138
- Week 60: 143
- Week 59: 144
- Week 58: 142
- Week 57: 144
- Month 13: +5 for the month (147 lbs.)
- Week 56: 142
- Week 55: 144
- Week 54: 144
- Week 53: 144
- 1 YEAR POST OP: total loss -135 lbs. ( weight: 142 lbs)
- Month 12: -7 lbs. for the month
- Week 52:142 yay!
- Week 51: 146 STILL!!!
- Week 50: 146
- Week 49: 146
- Month 11: -2 lbs for the month
- Week 48: 149
- Week 47: 153
- Week 46: 150
- Week 45: 152
- Month 10: -4 lbs. for the month
- Week 44: 151
- Week 43: 152
- Week 42: 148
- Week 41: 154
- Week 40: 151
- Month 9: -11 lbs. for the month
- Week 39: 155
- Week 38: 157
- Week 37: 160
- Week 36: 162
- Week 35: 165
- Month 8: -10 lbs. for the month
- Week 34: 166
- Week 33: 166
- Week 32: 167
- Week 31: 171
- Month 7: -10 lbs. for the month
- Week 30: 176
- Week 29: 175
- Week 28: 176
- Week 27: 181
- Month 6: -8 lbs. for the month
- Week 26: 186
- Week 25: 189
- Week 24: 188
- Week 23: 193
- Month 5: -17 lbs. for the month
- Week 22: 192
- Week 21: 197
- Week 20: 199
- Week 19: 204
- Week 18: 208
- Month 4: -10 lbs. for the month
- Week 17: 209
- Week 16: 210
- Week 15: 214
- Week 14: 218
- Month 3: -17 lbs. for the month
- Week 13: 219
- Week 12: 223
- Week 11: 226
- Week 10: 229
- Week 9: 233
- Month 2: -14 lbs. for the month
- Week 8: 236
- Week 7: 239
- Week 6: 244
- Week 5: 247
- Month 1: -28 lbs. for the month
- Week 4: 251
- Week 3: 254
- Week 2: 256
- Week 1: 260
- Surgery:274
- PreSurgery Weight: 277
"Chocolate Chip Cookies never loved me back. "-elasticwaist.com
LINK LOVE
- Amber's Weight Loss Blog
- Amy's Journey
- Becoming The Pin Up Girl
- Brownie Girl/Amber
- Gastric Bypass Catharsis
- Grey's Anatomy Blog
- Mega Meggs
- Melting Mama
- My Space
- Mysti's Blog
- OH
- Rebecca-The Genesis Journey
- Sharon's So Called LIfe
- Shrinking Susy
- Sign Girl
- Soon2bhottie
- Through Thick N Thin!
- Tracy's Blog
- youtube
- Yummy Low Carb WLS Friendly Recipes
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2 comments:
I know how you're feeling. My boobs droop, my legs and arms and stomach are flabby and when I look at myself naked I just laugh because I can't cry. I want PS eventually, but I just tell myself, look how awesome you look in clothes and that appeases me for a while. Maybe in a couple years you'll change your mind about PS but if not who cared, you're healtier now and that's the important thing. You can enjoy life the way you should and the extra skin shouldn't take away from that!
I know it might not be exactly what you want but good lord lady look at the spectacular face you've got coming out! I mean really. I knew that was going to come and you'd probably have to start dealing with jealousy issues from friends!!
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